This article was written by my nephew, many of you have heard me mention him in my seminars – A very inspirational story to say the least.
By Joe Morrone
Most people look at my life and assume it has been a hard life filled with a series of tragic events; it hasn’t been. In fact, it has been the opposite. Sure, I have had my share of obstacles, maybe more than most but those obstacles and overcoming them have made me who I am today.
I was born with Cerebral Palsy, which is a neurological condition that affects a person’s ability to move and maintain balance among other issues. It is caused by damage to the brain, usually due to a lack of oxygen for a period of time. The severity of Cerebral Palsy or CP can range from extremely mild to severe. In mild cases, it may not be apparent to anyone else that CP exists. The important thing to remember is that a vast majority of people afflicted with CP have above average intelligence but sometimes the physical manifestation of the condition leads to stereotypes surrounding a lack of intelligence.
Not to sound like a professional athlete but the CP is what it is. I do not believe I have ever said to myself or out loud that because of the CP I have to prove this or that, it’s always just been a part of who I am. I asked my best friend one time if I could take a pill that would make me “normal” would he want me to take it? His answer has always stuck with me. He said, “No because Cerebral Palsy is a part of who you are and I like you.” I guess that is how I’ve always looked at it, it’s just a part of who I am. I describe it as a love/hate relationship, this CP and I have been through a lot together and he frustrates the crap out of me sometimes, but I would not trade him for the world.
Now with the CP have come obstacles and, just maybe, an enlightened vision of how to overcome obstacles.
I hate to disappoint everyone, but I do not have a magical plan or a seven-step program to overcoming obstacles. It is simpler than that, you or I don’t have a choice! What is the alternative? Just to stay where you are and let the obstacle win? Of course not, you put one foot in front of the other and you just keep going. If you are going through hell, keep going!
It started at the beginning for me, I did not walk till I was four but my mom told me that it never stopped me. I figured out how to get from place to place by rolling onto my back and using my legs to push myself wherever I wanted to go. There was an obstacle, and I found a way to overcome it, even at 4! That is the key, there is always a way to overcome anything, but you have to keep putting one foot in front of the other, or in this case, one slide in front of the other.
When I speak to kids about my life and obstacles, and they ask their various questions, one story that almost always comes up is about me putting on my socks. Sounds strange, right but the lesson is a good one. For most people, putting on socks is something they just do, not even thinking about it. For me, though, it is a process that can take up to 10 minutes. When I tell that story, I always get the “oh man, I’m sorry” response but that is not the reason I tell the story.
I tell the story to illustrate that this is my reality, it is neither good or bad. It is what it is, and I have accepted that everyday things are going to take me longer than most and for me putting one foot in front of the other maybe slower than others, I still manage to do it every day.
In 2017, as if I had not overcome enough, I was diagnosed with bladder cancer, and it was already in stage 4. I am not going to go into the entire process because we would be here forever but there were multiple surgeries, chemotherapy, recurrence, immunotherapy, multiple infections, and countless hospitalizations. I am now almost to my 5-year mark since my last treatment after the recurrence and you know what the 5-year survival rate is for bladder cancer that has spread? It is 8%!
I do not say that to garner applause or sympathy, I say that because you know how I got here? Cmon, you know? I put one foot in front of the other. After the initial shock and emotion of the diagnosis, my wife and I decided we were going to attack this one step at a time. We started with the doctor’s appointment; we developed a plan, and we followed the plan. When I was going through a chemo treatment, I could not worry about the upcoming surgery. The only thing I could control that day at that time was that chemo treatment. There were a lot of steps, setbacks, tears, pain, and victories in that 8-year process, but it really was never an 8-year process. It was a series of steps that started with one.
As I close, I want to add one thing. While my process to overcoming obstacles is obvious, one step at a time, there is one more thing that matters, it’s attitude and want to, you have to believe that you are going to overcome, and you have to want to do it. When I started fighting Cancer, I knew I was going to win. We even made shirts that said, “Joe Will Win. The shirt and the saying were only physical signs of the attitude that I knew I had to have.
Your attitude and your outlook matter!
In the end, obstacles are there for all of us and while this is my story, your story is no less important or inspirational. We are all going through this life and in my experience the best way to do that is to put one foot in front of the other and see what happens next!
Joe Morrone
Retired Social Worker and Master Step Taker